I remember worrying about them on the night my daughters went to Heaven. I remember asking God to hold them and comfort them. I remember my heart aching for their loss ~ my loss.
I remember wondering if these children would ever be the same after something so tragic invaded their lives. I cried for them because they would wake up and not have my girls to call, to tell secrets to, to talk about life with, to laugh with and to celebrate with all the milestones they had yet to encounter. They were all so little and life was so hard.
When we were in the hospital waiting for Abigail’s organs to be matched a group of her friends came to visit and say goodbye. As we were gathered around her bed I pulled back the covers to show them her mismatched brightly painted toenails ~ I wanted them to know that she was still there beyond the machines that were helping her breath. Through our heartache we all smiled, laughed and told stories about how she loved to sit and paint each nail like a work of art ~ something we now call Abby Style. I remember how my heart felt as I saw each of them trying to make sense of what was happening. I remember wanting to take their pain away. I remember wanting for the nightmare to end and for us all to wake up. I remember holding her toes and being so grateful for her artistic ability.
I am so grateful for the friendships Anna and Abby have ~ as a mom that is one thing I wanted for my children, to have solid friendships and to know what it felt like to love and be loved by friends. My girls have both and those friendships have truly transcended through the toughest of circumstances.
This weekend two of Abigail’s dearest friends, Savannah and Grace, came over to help me with her quilt square for the Donate Life Threads for Life Quilt. These girls have become involved with Donate Life in honor of their friend and have been helping to share her donation story with their classmates, inspiring them to become a registered donor.
These two girls mean more to me than I think they could ever know. They have made a connection with Tom and I on a level that helps us stay connected with where Abigail would be at this moment in time. This connection is not due to pity or obligation, but rather is one based purely on the love they feel for their friend. When they hug Tom and I we not only feel their arms wrapped tightly around us but we also feel Abigail’s arms. I have a feeling that they would say the same thing about hugging us…they feel Abigail too.
After doing some sewing they went to their friend’s room, sat on her bed like teenagers do, and reminisced about the good old days when life wasn’t so hard.
The door was shut so I couldn’t hear what was said and that is exactly the way Abigail would have wanted it.
Thank you Savannah and Grace for loving Abigail with your whole heart and for loving her parents just the same. She is so lucky to have you both. Love you ❤